Maybe the Let it Go song from Frozen comes to mind as, Elsa let it go to move forward.
There are many ways to interpret this thought. With a resilient lens we’ll take a look at how you can let go so you can move forward.
First, ask yourself - “What’s holding me back? / “What am I holding on to?”
“What’s holding you back?” was one of my Saturday Journal prompts I shared on social media this week. This question is a terrific way to look at what might be holding you back and keeping you from moving forward. Another way to ask this is, “What am I holding on to?”
Take a moment and answer these questions, take some more time and go deeper into what might be holding you back. Make a list. Journal it out.
From clients and my personal experience below is a list what often holds us back or we hold on to- sometimes gripping with white fingers.
What may be holding back.
- The Past
- Uncertainty
- Fear
- Guilt
- Shame
- Dependency
- Over-responsibility
- Anger
- Denial
- Habits (that aren’t helping us/positive)
- Resistance to change
- Living for others
- Negative thoughts
- Relationships
- Clutter – mental and/or physical
- Work/Career
- Worry
- Anxiety
Do any of these hold you back? Which ones resonate?
Second: What do I want to let go of?
What do I want to let go of? is a powerful question to ask and part of the next step to let go. Some items on your list may be heavier and just really want to be dropped. Some may be easier to drop than others. Some are stickier.
Take time to look over your list and consider what one thing you’d like to get rid of. Small steps. Pick ONE! You can always look back over the list and let the next thing go. I work with my clients to have multiple small wins as a means of moving forward vs. big hard goals and steps and making little progress.
The beauty of this step is YOU get to choose. There’s power in naming the thing and then choosing to let it go.
Third – Where can I find support to let go?
There may be obstacles to letting go, that’s normal. Take a moment to consider those obstacles in your way. How can you mitigate those obstacles?
Next, think of who, what, where, how you can find support. Is it a group, a habit, new book, an accountability partner, a coach, new place to be/do, a new outfit, a reward?
Fourth – What does letting go look and feel like?
This step is a visioning step. Take time to deeply envision what letting go looks and feels like to you.
What does letting go look like?
The more rich details the better. Picture yourself letting it go. Does it fly away, drop down, ease off? Whatever it is, however it works for you – take time to see it, where is it, what is it, who is with you (if anyone), and so on. Write, draw, paint this vision.
How do you feel to let go?
How do you feel mentally, emotionally, physically? Take time to feel all 5 senses. Write this detailed vision and include your five senses for a rooted vision of success.
Fifth – What is the best thing about letting go?
This step answers your why. Why do I want to let go, what are the benefits to me, others? Why is it important to me? If I let go this is the best thing about it is …?
Sixth – Take time to enact and process letting go of it.
This is where you take the time to let go of whatever it is. This is the action of letting it go.
You choose: when, how, where and with whom.
Some ideas:
- Write it down and burn it, bury it, shred it.
- Do a visioning exercise.
- Picture your IT you’re letting go of where it floats, flies away, drops down on the ground, in the ocean, feel the pressure ease off, you let go of your hand, responsibility, or however you see yourself letting go.
Seventh and last step – Acknowledge and Celebrate you let go of it!
Notice how you feel. Take a moment to acknowledge the work you did in letting go. Celebrate your hard work in whatever way makes sense and feels good to you. Journal about this process and note this occasion so you can remember. Express gratitude toward yourself for letting go so you can move forward. Here's an article on why celebrating is so important to resiliency.
I find the quote below a great reminder on why letting go is so key to moving forward. It can help us to move forward even when it seems hard.
"The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.” ~ Steve Maraboli
My wish for you is to let go of what holds you back. May you be free to move forward. I want you to be free and resilient to live your amazing life. I’d love to chat and connect with you to discuss this.
If you or someone you know would like support with letting go and resiliency, please reach out and contact me. You can also forward this to them or even provide an e-mail introduction. I provide a safe place to explore your life and business. My clients inspire me as they grow and succeed.
PS. I have space for 1 client in my coaching practice this summer. If that's you, please contact me here, use the form at the bottom. Then let's have a conversation to see how I may be of support for you.
Teresa – Revisiting my letting go list
Teresa Q. Bitner, M.Ed., PMP, PCC - Resiliency, Change and Loss Coach
Partnering with those who have been knocked down my life and want to build resiliency and move forward and live a bold life.
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www.boldfulfilledlifecoach.com
Author of:
• Soul Love: How A Dog Taught Me to Breathe Again - 4.8 Stars on Amazon
• Torn in Half: The First Days - Widow Journey - 5 Stars on Amazon
• Explorations into the Being and Doing of Coaching: A collection of voices, insights and wisdom from Austin area coaches
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